They will of course protest otherwise, but one thing you’ll notice about the habitants of Warsaw is they don’t hang about when it comes to getting out of the big, bad city. Give them a long weekend and you’ll find the milk cancelled and a convoy of cars pointing in every direction but the city centre. For the most part the destination will be the town of Kazimierz Dolny, the mountains of Zakopane or the beaches of Sopot; wise and noble choices, the three of them, but why not go for more unchartered waters. Reszel, for instance. Never heard of it before? That’s for good reason, this place is Poland’s best kept secret. The town is tiny, population 5,098 promise the chaps at Wikipedia, but it features the kind of mist cloaked alleyways made famous in body snatcher films; uneven cobbles twist among derelict mills, and a Gothic bridge looms over a narrow stream. Dominating it all is the castle, a medieval masterpiece perched on top of a craggy rock. This precious reader’s is Reszel, the finest excuse in Poland to pack the bags and head into the yonder. Bring a camera, bring books, bring an appetite for krupnik and be prepared for some serious chillout; the arse end of nowhere has never been better.

Reszel acts as a perfect base to explore the wilds of Warmia and Mazuria. Hitler’s Wolfschanze bunker complex lies 30km to the east, and more Nazi fortifications can be explored 19km further at Mamerki. It’s here the German landforces held there command post. Tourism of a less sinister style can be conducted in the town of Ryn, itself equipped with an impressive hotel/castle, while six kilometres south east of Reszel don’t miss the chance to visit the Jesuit monastrey in Święta Lipka. The miracle inducing figure of St Mary has been attracting pilgrims since 1473, though just as many people visit to marvel at the lavish baroque architecture – possibly the best example of this style in Poland.

The town of Reszel lies 230km north of Warsaw, and the principal way to get there is by hiring a bat mobile. With a speedy set of wheels acquired your next step is to stick Reszel into the SatNav, alternatively trust in our directions and hope for the best - take road number 61 and aim for Pułtusk. From there join road number 57 to Biskupiec, before heading via road 596 to Bęsia. After that follow signs to Reszel. Alternatively, from Biskupiec reach Reszel via road 590 which passes through the town of Leginy. If that sounds like a pain in the neck then that’s because it is. Get others to do the legwork instead – the castle have their own people carrier, and they’re happy to ferry visitors up north in exchange for a zloty per kilometre travelled. If you steadfastly refuse to get into a car, and that’s not an unreasonable stance to take considering the kamikaze nature of the roads, then simply take a train to Olsztyn Główny before bussing it into Reszel. Once again the castle can organize transport from Olsztyn.

Built between 1350 and 1401 the castle is to Reszel what a parrot is to a pirate. Originally used for military purposes the end of the 16th centruy saw the zamek surrendered for recreational use, and it became a hunting residence for passing bishops. In 1772 it was turned into a Prussian prison, and fifty years later it was passed into the hands of an evnagelical commune. In 1958 stewardship of the castle was handed to the Social and Cultural Association, and nowadays you’ll find the castle leading a double life as a hotel with a specifically artsy angle. That’s down to sculptor and propreitor Boleslaw Marschall, and over the past few years he’s worked tirelessly to turn the zamek into a bona fide retreat while striving to preserve its character. The rooms, some of them positioned in medievel turrets, are excellent, many touting rough cut timber furnishings made by Marschall himself. There’s also a restaurant, its vaulted chambers decorated by the squiggles of passing artists, while next door stands a modern art gallery featuring the works of some of the biggest names in Polski art.

Reszel as we know it first took shape in 1241 when the Teutonic Knights bludgeoned their way into what was then the town of Resl, thereby sparking a bloody feud with a Prussian tribe called the Barts. It was the reapeated attacks of the Barts that prompted the invaders to build a fort, though in 1300 the knights were finally vanquished and slinked out of Reszel with their tail firmly between their legs. Herman of Prague awarded the city its Magdeburg Rights in 1337, and eleven years later work started on the Church of St Peter and Paul. Today the church boasts a classical interior dating from the first half of the 19th century, and a 51 metre tower open to the paying public; bring a head for heights and a fearless attitude to rickety wooden stairwells.

The 14th century proved a busy time for Reszel. Work on a brick castle commenced in 1350, and it was also around this time that the Gothic bridge was added. Rebuilt and embellished over the course of history the bridge only regained its original look in 2000 – prior to that the high arches you now see were filled with brick, and the inside used as a prison; yup, that Swiss-cheese style hole above one of the arches once functioned as a medieval jail cell. Below the bridge check out the 18th century granary buildings, and don’t miss out on the baroque glories found in the Przemienienia Pańskiego Church.

Reszel escaped comparatively lightly during WWII, losing just 20% of its buildings, though the locals are by no means strangers to calamity. The early 19th century saw the town hit by a spate of arson attacks, and the Great Fire of 1806 left much of the town a smouldering pile of ruins. The people demanded justice, and they found their scapegoat in the comely shape of Barbara Zdunk. Before the fire the 40something lass had attracted attention on account of her fondness for teenage lads and black arts. That was all the evidence the locals needed, and Zdunk was promptly torched at the stake. Later evidence suggests the mob toasted the wrong person, and nowadays you’ll find the whining spectre of banshee Basia clunking round the corridors of the castle. Downtown Reszel rebuilt itself in classical style, though it’s still possible to glimpse Reszel through a medieval lens – take for example the building right outside the castle. Completed in 1444 it might look like a derelict mess, but this is actually the oldest surviving house in Reszel, and a former home for serving priests. Resist the temptation to break in, this place is ready to fall into the river behind.